Tattoo

I was welcomed into this world through interrupted lives, torn flesh, and screaming agony.

I will leave it through unfulfilled dreams, incomplete thoughts, and screaming agony.

Until then, here you will find me waiting.

In my numbered days,

I will burn myself on the stove a few more times,

I will slice my hands with paper and kitchen knives again,

I will weep in my bed of a broken heart again,

And the death of my beloved dog will one day ruin me.

In my numbered days,

I will someday get that tonsillectomy,

I will stub my toe against the bedframe a myriad more times,

I will burn my throat with hard liquor again,

And the loss of my mother will one day consume me.

In my numbered days,

I will experience a thousand and one more stomach aches,

I will cry out about missed opportunities,

I will feel a weird ache in my side that I do not recognize,

And the death of my grandmother awaits me.

In my numbered days,

I will mourn friends and lovers,

I will fail myself and them again,

I will hate the woman in the mirror,

And the possibility of outliving my lover scares me.

In my numbered days,

I will mourn myself and who I was years prior,

I will binge and purge calories through tears,

I will be poked and prodded by doctors as death becomes me,

And the death of who writes this today perplexes me.

Until then, here you will find me waiting.

Carving runes into my flesh, screaming in agony,

Cursing the queue.